Stupid News

[TheBeesSneeze]

There's a nightmare she will have for eternity...

[Wolfwood]

This is the kind of story @NostradamusTheSeer lives for.  The sick bastard who wrote this article had way too much fun. I think it is fair to say, this is the very worst of American society... when it produces whatever this is... lol.

NY Post

Woman Who Made $200,000 From Selling Farts In Jars Suffers Scare Caused By Excess Gas

She had a fart attack.

A reality TV star who launched a gassy venture peddling her fancy flatulence to strangers Stephanie Matto, 31, blew away people on social media when she recently announced that she makes more than $50,000 a week selling her farts.

The Connecticut resident had gained international recognition after appearing on the reality show “90 Day Fiancé” and later started her own YouTube channel, wrote books and founded an X-rated subscription site called Unfiltrd.

She then really made waves with her olfactory business by capturing her emissions in jars and selling them because she “thought it’d be a hilarious publicity move that would get a lot of people’s attention.”

But after making $200,000 in sales, the influencer has announced her retirement when she passed one too many and got the wind knocked out of her, Jam Press reported.

Matto was rushed to a hospital with chest pains she feared were symptoms of a heart attack, according to the outlet.

After undergoing a battery of tests, including blood work and an EKG, Matto was told that her pain was the result of her steady diet of gas-inducing beans and eggs.

“I thought I was having a stroke and that these were my final moments,” Matto told Jam Press. “I was overdoing it.” 

The self-proclaimed “fartrepreneuer” had squeezed out up to 50 jars’ worth of farts a week to keep up with demand – and even added protein shakes to her diet to make them more pungent.

“I remember within one day I had about three protein shakes and a huge bowl of black-bean soup,” she said.

“I was advised to change my diet and to take a gas suppressant medication, which has effectively ended my business,” she said.

Matto explained that she decided to launch her butt business “on a whim” after getting requests.

“As luck would have it, once I put the jars up for sale, they began to sell like hotcakes,” she said.

“I honestly could not believe the demand. I think a lot of people have this fetish in secret. I began this venture by eating mostly protein muffins, shakes and also hard-boiled eggs,” Matto continued.

She said she “decided to branch out a little bit and try some new recipes to keep it exciting.”

The natural-gas manufacturer’s menu also included black-bean salad, onion and ham-and-pepper omelettes.

“I think that certain foods produce better-smelling farts,” Matto said, explaining that she put a heavy emphasis on smoothies.

Despite her financial success, the reception to her unique business has been mixed, according to Jam Press.

“I have a lot of people praising me, calling me a girl boss, telling me that I inspire them to be unashamed of who they are and what they do,” Matto said.

“But on the other end, I have been getting a ton of negativity. I have even received death threats, people telling me I should end my life and so on,” she added.

“I try my best to not react to these people and give them what they want, which is attention,” Matto told the outlet. “In this day and age, we need to stop tearing people down for their choices.”

She added: “I think my family is relieved [about my retirement], and honestly so is my colon. The diet was never sustainable and there was always an expiration date.”

The newly retired fart peddler said she plans to donate a portion of her income to charity that supports gastric disorders.

“Even though I got backlash, I think it has opened a new door for me. I’m working on digital fart jar artwork at the moment,” Matto said.

“I think everything happens for a reason, and although my fart-selling days are ending, I am going to save the money I’ve made and will put some into crypto,” she added.

[Kmlp]

I don't know what's worse for me: the article itself, or the fact that this was the first thing I saw upon visiting this topic for the first time 🤣🤣🤣

[Grapefoot]

I don't know what's worse for me: the article itself, or the fact that this was the first thing I saw upon visiting this topic for the first time 🤣🤣🤣

Welcome to the Stupid News topic.  

[RainySunshine]

*Reads the headline and makes tries to hold in a laugh*

I can tell... this is going to be a very stupid news article.

[NostradamusTheSeer]

You know, my sister-in-law, a few years back, told me about folks doing this sort of thing on eBay, and I, in my best David Spade "Joe Dirt" voice, said, "Well, maybe if it came outta Pamela Anderson's ass, I could see myself buyin' it."  I mean, if you're going to shell out, what, a hundred bucks for a toot under glass, sure, you want one from the ex-Baywatch beauty's botty, not from some fourth-rate reality TV star or obscure fashion blogger calling themselves an "influencer".

[Anyponedrawn]

I don't speak for everyone.... but... I wouldn't want anything in a jar.... from someone....

[Wolfwood]

USA Today bashed for naming Rachel Levine 'Woman of the Year'

Dr. Rachel Levine, the nation’s first openly transgender federal official to be confirmed by the Senate, was named USA Today’s “Women of the Year” Sunday, sparking outrage from her critics. USA Today has been lauded by some for giving Levine the honor, but criticized by others.

A lot of the criticism stems from her decision making during the pandemic while serving in her role as Pennsylvania’s health secretary. Levine reportedly oversaw the implementation of guidance requiring Pennsylvania nursing homes to accept COVID-positive patients discharged from the hospital – a move critics argue directly contributed to the more than 13,200 nursing home coronavirus deaths in the state. Data on COVID nursing home deaths in Pennsylvania was often missing and incomplete, and Levine often gave contradictory answers when pressed on the issue.

Nonetheless, she was still tapped by President Joe Biden for her current role as Assistant Secretary for Health for the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services (HHS), where she has helped oversee the federal response to COVID-19.

[Wolfwood]

So here's the deal.  The latest issue is Trans sports players (men transitioning to women) are joining women's sports leagues and absolutely crushing the women competition.  They are setting new women's records, not by seconds, but in some cases by minutes.  Men have a different body structure obviously than women and it allows them to excel in certain sports over women.  The issue is, how is this right to all the women athletes being beat by men who now say they are women?  How will women's records ever be taken seriously if there is always going to be an asterisk next to it saying "by trans players" meaning it wasn't a biological women who made the record.  It would therefore mean women's records don't exist and you'd have to look down to the first player without an * next to their name to see the true winner.

A lot of these players who originally played as men saw middling to no success in the men's side of sports, which leads many to think they are transitioning just so they can be considered excellent players on the female side of things.

Is this right, wrong?

Right now the big one everyone is talking about Lia Thomas (who was a man and now they say they are a women). 

Trans swimmer Lia Thomas wins national women's title

‘Disappointed’ And ‘Frustrated’: Female Swimmer Says Trans Athlete Lia Thomas Takes Away Opportunities For Women

How Transgender Athletes Are Poised To Ruin Girls’ Sports

Do Trans Athletes Have Advantage: Yes.

The Transgender Threat to Women's Sports

How the Transgender Movement is Destroying Women’s Sports

Trans athletes are making a travesty of women’s sports

Meanwhile, the political left, Democrats, and the ACLU say that trans players in women's sports is good.  Here is their complete argument presented by the ACLU: Argument.  For the left it comes down that sex is fluid and can be changed at anytime.


So how do we solve trans-players in sports, whether male or female? 

My answer, have sports leagues that accept male, female, and anyone else into the league.  That way it isn't just a male or female record being kept.  Male and female leagues of course would still dominate and exist, since they are the majority.  But anyone who wishes to play in co-ed leagues can. 

[Bondi]

Diversity advocates mistakenly accuse black DJ of wearing black face.

[Silverwing]

^ I saw that on tv the other day.  I just shook my head.  The two people who did the accusing are apparently "professional woksters" and part of the local Democrat Party.  Their whole job is to find things wrong and cause problems.  Glad you posted that.

[Wolfwood]

You could say this was crappy.

Woman Rescued After Falling Into Toilet Trying To Get Her Phone

"A woman who accidentally dropped her cellphone into the hole of a pit toilet and fell in while trying to retrieve it had to be rescued by firefighters in rural Washington.

Brinnon Fire Department Chief Tim Manly said the woman, who was at the top of Mount Walker northwest of Seattle, had been using her phone when it fell into the toilet on Tuesday, The Kitsap Sun reported.

Manly said she disassembled the toilet seat and used dog leashes to try and get the phone and eventually used the leashes to tie herself off as she reached for it. That effort failed and she fell into the toilet headfirst.

"They didn't work very well and in she went," Manly said.

The woman was alone and tried to get out for 10-15 minutes. Reunited with her phone, she called 911, Manly said.

Responding firefighters passed her blocks to stand on to reach a harness, which they used to pull her out of the vault. The Brinnon Fire Department said the woman said she was uninjured.

She was washed down and "strongly encouraged to seek medical attention after being exposed to human waste, but she only wanted to leave," the department said.

"I've been doing this for 40 years and that was a first," Manly said."

[NostradamusTheSeer]

Wait, I think I saw this on an episode of Cake....

[Silverwing]

Oh dear gosh no... DEAR GOSH NO.  Is this how the legendary tale of Chris Chan ends?

Internet Personality Arrested on Incest Charges

Internet personality Chris Chan was arrested on a charge of incest on Sunday and was booked in the Henrico County Jail in Virginia.

Chris Chan, otherwise known as Mrs. Christine W. Chandler Sonichu, is a webcomic creator, artist, blogger, and YouTuber.

Click here for full details...

[RainySunshine]

Oh no.